You’ve heard sooo many of my clients share their stories on the podcast, you’ve read about their transformations and how they rave about their experience.
You’ve literally heard it in their voices as they share...
THEY FEEL EMPOWERED, LIBERATED FROM THE STRUGGLE, AND LOVING THEIR RESULTS.
If you pay close attention, you’ll see that a consistent common denominator is this:
THEY’VE LEARNED THE SKILL OF SELF-COMPASSION.
→ They’ve learned how to be kind to themselves, and actually supportive OF themselves >>> which is the TOTAL OPPOSITE of what most of us learn as women: to be constantly critical and ‘never good enough’.
I’ve talked about emotional eating MANY times on the podcast, but today we’re zero-ing in on a really important one, that deserves its very own episode: SELF PITY.
I can’t even tell you HOW MANY TIMES I emotionally over-ate and sabotaged my goals DUE TO FEELING SELF PITY.
Self pity about my weight, self pity about my body, self pity about relationship stuff, work stuff (the list goes on!)… or even just self pity about my life in general. And whenever I felt this way, I didn’t know any other thing to do, but to eat about it as a temporary means for distraction.
THIS is the case for most women. It completely explains WHY it’s possible for someone to know exactly ‘what to do’ to lose the weight, but then emotionally eat to the point of even regaining all the weight they’ve lost. Because when it comes to emotions like this one, we just haven’t known any other way... UNTIL NOW ;)
I can remember SO CLEARLY moments of my life where I TRULY felt and believe that:
-Food was the only ‘good thing’ in my life.
- Food (specifically, popcorn at the end of the day…) was the ONLY thing to ‘look forward to’.This is something that comes up A LOT as I’m coaching my clients inside THE LAST 10 Program.
One of the skills you’ve heard me talk about before (but I break down in this episode in a new way) is: EMOTIONAL COURAGE.
In this Episode I specifically examine Self-pity as part of our human emotional experience- HOW to navigate that. We take an even closer, microscopic look at Self-Pity vs Self-Compassion, and moreover HOW TO ACTUALLY OFFER YOURSELF COMPASSION IN YOUR MOST CHALLENGING MOMENTS as a wayyyyy more effective strategy. (pro tip: Self-compassion is a powerful antidote for self-sabotage!)
For me, Compassion is like being able to offer LOVE from myself TO MYSELF in moments when I’m feeling MOST uncomfortably challenged. HAVING THIS SKILL CHANGED THE COURSE OF MY LIFE. (not to mention, I also stopped rage eating which means I now maintain an 80 pound weight loss with ease, and joy and love...)
I share a personal example and story from when I navigated being a brand new mom, and that infamous newborn stage. It was one of the HARDEST things I’ve ever done, it involved BOTH self-pity AND compassion.
The game-changer was honing in on the difference between the two, developing the ability to generate self-compassion FOR YOURSELF, while also allowing for some self-pity as needed.
So… if you find yourself feeling like ‘food is the only thing to look forward to’ at the end of your day, your week, or overall right now in your life-
Put in your earbuds. RELAX. ENJOY. And take in this powerful, game-changing message.
Xo
Brenda
ps! ARE YOU COMING?
The next program start date is:
MONDAY, DECEMBER 6TH.
My clients are leaving the weight struggle behind AND LOVING THEIR RESULTS.
Get on in here sister! ENROLL TODAY
WARNING: NO 'holiday tips and tricks' here.
But that’s actually the good news!
HERE’S WHY: When you buy those magazines last minute at the grocery store as you’re checking out (Oh, I KNOW. Been there. DONE THAT), the ones that say on the cover ‘Tips to lose weight this Holiday Season’... the problem is that these kinds of articles in magazines and ‘special segments’ on the news, typically focus on ONE thing:
→ THE ACTIONS.
They focus on telling you ‘what’ to do ( what NOT to do, what to eat, what NOT to eat, when to do it, how often, how much, how little, etc).
The thing about HUMANS is that the decisions we make are not determined by having information about ‘what to do’ → our decisions are driven by our emotions. The things we want to feel or NOT feel.
Let’s go another layer deep into our human behavior:
Our emotions are determined by how we’re thinking about things (ie. HOW YOU’RE THINKING about food, about your weight loss, about your body, about the Holiday).
REAL- LIFE HOLIDAY EXAMPLE-
...Let’s say you’re stressed about Thanksgiving, and you’re already DREADING all the social interactions. PLUS you’re also feeling anxious because you know there’s gonna be TONS of food around and you don’t wanna F-up your weight loss progress. (not to mention, your family are HARDCORE food pushers)...
...Let’s say you ALSO think about food as a way to ‘take-the-edge-off’...
→ If there’s ALL THIS going on for you, It doesn’t matter if you ‘KNOW’ the ‘tip’ about bringing your own healthy holiday dish to the family potluck that you read in Cosmo earlier that week - because if you’re feeling THIS emotionally charged and food is your go-to (plus maybe also some wine ;) ...
Then you’re still gonna end up EMOTIONALLY eating stuff that doesn’t support your weight loss goals (Yes, even though you ‘know’ all the ‘tips’ and you ‘know’ exactly WHAT to eat).THIS IS EXACTLY why in my LAST 10 program and on my podcast I don’t do ‘tips-n-tricks’.
Instead, we go to the CORE of it, which is equipping you with brain and emotional self care tools. (I’m ALL about EMPOWERING YOU sister!).Instead, we bring awareness to decondition limiting beliefs and ways of thinking so that you can ACTUALLY make the decisions that will create the results you’re wanting, while ALSO feeling the way you actually want to FEEL in your life when it comes to your weight loss, body image, and food.
This week on the podcast you’re gonna get a powerful and carefully curated collection of some of MY BEST HOLIDAY CONTENT from the past 5 years of podcasting!
Narrated my podcast producer, Michelle, who’s lost over 70 pounds applying what I teach on the podcast. She’s now in her goal weight range, and she’s determined to continue losing weight through the Holidays. (I freakin LOVE Michelle! Get ready to smile, laugh, and maybe even cry as you listen…)
So no, we don’t do tips ‘n tricks around here. NOPE.
If that sh*t ‘worked’... NO ONE would gain weight through the holidays, cuz those tips-and-tricks are literally EVERYWHERE.
WE DO WAY BETTER then ‘tricks’.→ OUR HUMAN BRAIN IS OUR MAIN OPERATING SYSTEM.
ALL DECISIONS come from our brain.
Every. Single. One.
Which means this:
The answer for creating change in your choices and results through the Holidays (and ANY other time of the year) is by UNDERSTANDING YOUR THINKING.
I’m here for you this Holiday Season. (AND ALL YEAR ROUND!)
As we officially enter these Holidays-
I’m SO thankful to have you in my world.
It’s an honor AND A JOY to be a part of your one-of-a-kind Journey, and support you ALL the way to your biggest, BOLDEST, most audacious, personal goals.
LISTEN TO THIS GREATEST HITS EPISODE - HOLIDAY EDITION!
Xo
Brenda
ps- ARE YOU COMING?
The next Last 10 Program start date is:
MONDAY, DECEMBER 6TH.My clients are leaving the weight struggle behind AND LOVING THEIR RESULTS.
Get on in here! ENROLL TODAY
The majority of my clients come to me because they are just at a loss for how to stop emotionally eating and overeating in a way that sabotages their goals and desired results.
This weeks' episode is a must listen, because I breakdown 3 key points that will be important for you to know as you decondition emotional eating and overeating habits (I've never broken down in this way before!)
...Did you know you’re allowed to FEEL whatever the heck you want to feel about things?
...Did you know that you’re allowed to THINK whatever the heck you want to think about things?
You are.
Permission granted. And I really do mean ALL the human emotions.
ALL OF THEM.
Not just the ‘pretty’ ones.
You’re allowed to feel pissed, and annoyed and frustrated and disappointed.
And it’s actually important that YOU give YOURSELF: Permission to Commiserate.
Permission to feel lousy if that’s were you’re at.
Having a human experience is NOT a problem.
Brain self care tools (aka thought work) are NOT meant to be used as a weapon against yourself or just another reason to be critical of yourself.
Brain self care tools are NOT meant to be for the purpose of bypassing your human experience.
Brain self care tools (ie. thought work) are meant to be used AS TOOLS, FOR your human experience.
In this episode, I break down for you three key points that are important as you continue to revolutionize BOTH your results in this area of your life, as well as YOUR EXPERIENCE.
And yes, THE FULL SPECTRUM of human emotions (yes, even the ‘lousy’ ones…) are ALLOWED to be (and meant to be!) a part of that.
xo Brenda
ps! ARE YOU COMING?
The next program start date is:
MONDAY, DECEMBER 6TH.
My clients are leaving the weight struggle behind AND LOVING THEIR RESULTS.
Get on in here sister! ENROLL TODAY
Women ALL around the world internally struggle with emotional eating and sabotage.
Here’s how it goes down:
You were planning to 'eat healthy' or 'follow your diet' but then... you eat an Oreo.
Next thing you know, you've spent the rest of the night eating the full package of Oreos.After having eaten all the Oreos, you overeat and sabotage all weekend long. 
You think to yourself:
'Ugh. I did it again. I'll start over and be really 'on plan' AFTER that...'
The reason I know exactly how this goes down, is because THIS was one of the cycles I was stuck in for decades. I've also coached HUNDREDS of women, from ALL walks of life on this exact overeating pattern.
Believe it or not, the cycle I've described here is fueled by: (drum roll please....) PERFECTIONISM.
I know this doesn't 'sound' like Perfectionism. (And in fact, you're likely thinking this doesn't even apply to you because YOU see yourself as being FAR FROM PERFECT. )Here's the wild thing though:
Perfectionism is a way of thinking.
'Perfectionism' doesn't actually mean 'being perfect'. 
When it comes to weight loss and weight struggles, perfectionism rears its little head by leading you to believe that in order to be 'done' struggling with your weight: YOU NEED TO BE 'PERFECT' and you'll need to 'eat perfect' FOREVER.
FOR-E-VER. (ugh. I'm exhausted just thinking about 'being perfect' forever.)
One of the MOST common questions I get is - Brenda ‘HOW DO I STOP OVEREATING AND SABOTAGING MY GOALS?!’
In order to ‘stop’ it’s important to first understand what’s driving the overeating and sabotage...
THE CAUSE OF OVEREATING IN THIS WAY IS: PERFECTIONISTIC THINKING.
On todays’ episode I teach you a new concept and break perfectionism/perfectionistic thinking down in a brand new way.
I also invite you into a new and upgraded possibility for your weight loss AND your life:
BEING IN PARTNERSHIP WITH YOUR BODY.
Now, listen- I know this may sound way over-simplified but DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE the absolutely life-changing POWER OF being in partnership with your body.
THIS IS THE MOST PRACTICAL AND EFFECTIVE THING YOU CAN DO.
(It's how I have maintained an 80 pound weight loss with ease and JOY, and love for years now- after having struggled for decades...)It’s vital for you to know that your means of approaching your desired results (*PERFECTIONISM) IS JUST NOT WORKING.
TODAY, I'm personally inviting you INTO A COMPLETELY NEW POSSIBILITY-
*IF you are willing to swap out Perfectionistic Thinking for instead: BEING IN PARTNERSHIP WITH YOUR BODY:
Get ready to be done with the struggle.
Get ready to be done with the sabotage.
Get ready to be done with the ‘eff-it’ moments and overeating.
Here, at THE LAST 10, we're all about UPGRADES BABY.
Instead of being at war with yourself, and your body ---> DECIDE TO BE IN THE MOST AMAZING, CONNECTED, LOVING PARTNERSHIP WITH YOUR BODY.
Game changer.
Results changer.
LIFE CHANGER.
You do NOT wanna miss this one.
LISTEN NOW
To lose your ‘last 10’ using my proven method JOIN THE LAST 10™ Program-
GET ALL THE DETAILS HERE: www.brendalomeli.com/thelast10
As we celebrate over 250 episodes, almost 5 yrs of ‘THE LAST 10’ podcast… This LAST 10 special series is gonna be our BEST OF, my greatest hits. I believe EVERY single episode of the podcast until now, has had its own unique value but in this GREATEST HITS SERIES I’m brining you the highlights of ONLY the very best.--
In these special episodes you’ll meet Michelle, a listener of the podcast, and also a member of my podcast production team. Michelle has lost 70 POUNDS and has completely transformed this area of her life listening to the podcast and applying what I teach. (You’ll get goosebumps listening to her story and I’m pretty certain you won’t help but smile yourself, as you listen to her share the joy and confidence she’s been able to create!)
If you’re a new listener of the podcast, THIS is gonna be such the most amazing way to go on a powerfully-curated, guided tour as you listen to ONLY our most popular episodes- from the very beginning.
And if you’ve been a listener for years, perhaps you’re even one of my clients - I INVITE YOU TO JOIN US. You’ll be able to hear the life-changing teachings, the game-changing analogies and all the classic ‘LAST 10’ concepts in a whole new way, at a whole new level from where you are, in your journey today.
Volume Ten- LISTEN NOW
To lose your ‘last 10’ using my proven method JOIN THE LAST 10™ Program-
GET ALL THE DETAILS HERE: www.brendalomeli.com/thelast10
If you missed any of the past greatest hits, find them here:
- http://brendalomeli.com/greatest-hits-volume-1/
- http://brendalomeli.com/ep-240-greatest-hits-volume-2/
- http://brendalomeli.com/greatest-hits-volume-3/
- https://brendalomeli.com/greatest-hits-volume-4/
- https://brendalomeli.com/253-greatest-hits-volume-6/
- https://brendalomeli.com/255-greatest-hits-holiday-edition-part-2/
- https://brendalomeli.com/greatest-hits-volume-5/
- https://brendalomeli.com/260-greatest-hits-volume-6/
- https://brendalomeli.com/264-greatest-hits-volume-7/
- https://brendalomeli.com/268-greatest-hits-volume-8/
- https://brendalomeli.com/272-greatest-hits-volume-9/